A small raccoon lives in a red cone dangling from the goalie's belt.
Leaky Canal
My mother and I are hired to fix a leaky canal. In order to figure out where the leak is, we pee in the water. We follow the trail of pee to the leak, where we build a dam.
Paint Tigers
You buy a $3000 machine that grinds up anything and turns it into plain white house paint. You say it even works on Tigers.
Michael McKean Needs Her Head
A plain, overweight girl hurls herself into a tunnel every day, and enters an alternate universe where a young man loves her.
Today a train catches fire and blocks the tunnel. The girl throws herself at the flaming train over and over, seriously injuring herself.. but she cannot cross.
Back at her apartment waits Michael McKean, from This Is Spinal Tap. He is a serial killer, and he has discovered her secret.
Also, he is the superintendent of her apartment building. So he has the keys.
He pulls her fridge aside and exposes the hand-drawn charts and calculations she used to enter the other world.
He grabs white paint and starts painting everything over. He is a terrible painter, and it takes forever, and is very patchy.
When the girl returns home, limping and wretched, he saws off her head.
As she dies, she realizes that the other universe only ever existed in her own mind.
That’s why Michael McKean needs her head.
Amelia Earhart's Hip Waders
Amelia Earhart falls into a hole filled with six feet of cold water. Her hip waders are useless. She climbs back out and acts like nothing happened.