I lose my engagement ring while shopping for underpants. I look everywhere. The cashier lends me her metal detector. It works like a vacuum, but sucks up only metal objects. I run it over the whole store, and sit down on the floor to open up the collection canister. Inside are plastic doll parts.. faces, and arms and legs. Nothing metal.
The Aliens are Coming
We hear that the aliens are landing in Toronto. This is pretty close, so we decide to leave town. I try to get our family into the station wagon, but people keep getting back out of the car, for stupid reasons. It is like playing Whac-A-Mole. It is so frustrating. I mean, THE ALIENS ARE COMING.
Push Me Higher, Daddy
The houseplant was saying PUSH ME HIGHER DADDY. I have no idea.
houseplant
Tupac Shakur aka Richard
We are moving into a new apartment. As we enter the lobby, the concierge comes toward us. He is definitely Tupac Shakur, and we exclaim loudly at his being alive. He says : SHHHH I GO BY RICHARD NOW. Later, he gives us three passes to the new Star Wars movie, to say thank-you for keeping his secret.
Whales
I am swimming. The waves are high and I am in over my head. Someone is hacking away at a narrow spit protecting my harbour. When it is breached, rough waters pour in. Further out, two whales are jumping in and out of the water. People call to me from the beach. I head out to sea.